Dillon Empire Update February 2023

Posted on February 24, 2023 by simondillon

Whilst I carry on writing the first draft of the new novel in earnest (currently about 75,000 words in, closing in on the end of chapter 18), I’ve continued to be as prolific as ever on Medium and Patreon. Here are a few highlights.

On Patreon, I’m serialising the current unpolished draft of my psychological mystery thriller The Balliol Conspiracy. I’ve also kept up with my awkward video updates, and one or two other bits and pieces. Here’s a sample of what’s available to supporters.

February Video Update

Watch me awkwardly bumble my way through a writing update in a woodland, decidedly in need of a haircut, and sounding out of breath. Plus added snark from subtitles added by my eldest son.

Interviewing My Characters: James Harper from Children of the Folded Valley

I thought it might be fun to run a series of short interviews conducted with characters from my novels. First up, the protagonist of my most successful novel to date, Children of the Folded Valley. Here, I imagine him being harassed by a curious journalist in-between the events of acts two and three (which are alluded to in mysterious, hopefully intriguing terms, but not spoiled for those who haven’t read the novel).

Diary of an Alien Invasion Commander

This is a snippet of a satirical sci-fi comedy project I started fifteen years ago, abandoned, and am considering picking up again. It might wind up as a short story or novella, but this is a sample what I’ve written so far. It concerns an extremely reluctant alien invader, mired in middle management apathy.

The Balliol Conspiracy Chapter 5

In this chapter, bridge engineer Stanley Orchard has an unexpected visit from an old friend, who finds himself in an extremely unpleasant situation.

As for Medium, here are a few highlights of what I’ve been up to over the past month.

A Story Isn’t a Sermon

An interview with yours truly conducted by Ben Human of The Pro Files

Roald Dahl Censored by Sensitivity Readers

Newspeak strikes again. Where does it end?

Schindler’s List: One Person Can Make a Difference

The timeless message of Steven Spielberg’s landmark Holocaust drama.

Titanic in 3D? No Thanks

James Cameron’s romantic disaster epic gets a Valentine’s week cinema rerelease, but the Dillon Empire rages at the absence of 2D screenings.

Oscar Predictions 2023

The Dillon Empire mulls over this year’s Academy Award nominees.

Every Steven Spielberg Film Ranked: Part 1 of 3

The Dillon Empire lists the great director’s films in order of personal preference. (NOTE: There’s a link to the second part at the end, which in turn has a link to the third part at the end.)

How I Brainwashed My Children with Great Films: Part 6

You too can breed smug specimens of cinematic literacy. (NOTE: This is the final part in this series. There are links to all five previous parts at the beginning).

That’s a wrap for this month. Thank you again for all your support, and as always, a massive extra huge thank you to all my supporters on Patreon – Claus, Robin, Eric, David P, Steve, Emma, Sterling, Galina, Ian, Gillian, Yasmine and Ville, plus those who have contributed one-off donations on Ko-fi. Also, thank you to Ruth and Iain, and David S, and to everyone who has bought books, reviewed books, and promoted or supported me in other ways. You are hugely, hugely appreciated, and I couldn’t do this without you.

If you aren’t already a supporter on Patreon, please take a look at this link, which outlines my writing goals for the next year, clearly stating how much I wish to raise and why, and offering support levels of £2, £4, £8, and £25 per month, with different benefits at each level. Please consider supporting me, even if only at the lower level, as every contribution helps.

Those of you who aren’t Medium subscribers get three free reads per month. However, if you decide to subscribe to Medium to read all my work (and the work of many others), please do so via this link, as it means I financially benefit from your subscription.

Thank you again for supporting my writing.

Medium and Patreon Update: January 2023

Posted on January 20, 2023 by simondillon

I’ve had a busy start to 2023. Whilst writing the first draft of my latest novel, I’ve also been posting on Patreon and Medium, as usual.

On Patreon, I’ve added a number of new insights into my writing, updates, and other exclusive bits and pieces for my supporters. For instance, they now have chapters three and four of my novel The Balliol Conspiracy, which I’m serialising the draft, pre-edited version of, as a special bonus for those supporting at “Knight of the Dillon Empire” level (£8 per month), or higher. The Balliol Conspiracy, which will almost certainly be retitled when I eventually decide what to do with it, is a romantic psychological mystery-cum spy thriller a genre apart from my usual gothic oeuvre.

For Knights of the Dillon Empire, here are the two latest instalments.

The Balliol Conspiracy Chapter 3

Bridge engineer Stanley Orchard goes to Heathrow airport to collect the mysterious left luggage suitcase he bid for in an online auction, only to become suspicious he is being watched.

The Balliol Conspiracy Chapter 4

Stanley Orchard goes to visit his mother, having picked up the mysterious left luggage suitcase he’d bid for in an online auction. His mother has some surprising personal news, and an intriguing visitor.

January Video Update

My awkward video update shenanigans continue, and once again, as per my December update, my eldest son tries to muscle in on the act, leaving various sarcastic captions as I spout about what I’ve been up to. I’ve had some supporters tell me they are patrons for these video updates alone, as they enjoy watching me squirm on camera. I shall continue to indulge their sadistic whims. These updates are available from the lowest support tier and up, so if you wish to become an “Ally of the Dillon” Empire, it’s a mere £2 per month.

New Gothic Mystery Novel: January 2023 Update

Supporters on Patreon at “Free Citizen of the Dillon Empire” level or higher (£4 per month) get these exclusive updates and insights into progress on my latest novel, and my writing process in general. If you want news about what I’m up to, you’ll hear it here first.

Elsewhere, I’ve been busy on Medium. Herewith some highlights, beginning with the first part of this series I’ve just started.

How I Brainwashed My Children with Great Films: Part 1

You too can breed smug specimens of cinematic literacy.

Do I Stay for the End Credits?

The Dillon Empire’s take on when to sit through the cinematic slow curtain.

Why I Defend Dances with Wolves

Over thirty years later, despite criticisms, this Avatar-inspiring epic western remains a triumph for Kevin Costner.

How to Plan the Perfect Double Bill

Intriguing cinematic pairings, and how to curate them.

My Fifteen Favourite Beautiful Films

A personal selection of sublime cinematography.

That’s a wrap for this month. Thank you again for all your support, and as always, an extra huge thank you to all my supporters on Patreon – Claus, Robin, Eric, David P, Steve, Emma, Sterling, Galina, Ian, Gillian, Yasmine and Ville, plus those who have contributed one-off donations on Ko-fi. Also, thank you to Ruth and Iain, and David S, and to every one of you who has bought books, reviewed books, and promoted or supported me in other ways. You know who you are, and I wouldn’t be here without you.

Thank you again for supporting my writing.

Medium and Patreon Update: November 2022

Posted on November 18, 2022 by simondillon

This month on Patreon, I’ve added several new articles, updates, and other snippets for supporters, including chapter two of my draft novel The Balliol Conspiracy. This romantic psychological mystery-cum spy thriller isn’t a part of my usual gothic oeuvre, but I am serialising the draft manuscript as an exclusive for those who support me at Knight of the Dillon Empire level or higher. For those of you who are supporters, in case you’ve missed these, here are a few highlights.

The Balliol Conspiracy Chapter 2

Bridge engineer Stanley Orchard is drawn into a web of intrigue after bidding an outrageous price for a mysterious suitcase in left luggage at Heathrow airport. However, this chapter is primarily a flashback, detailing his relationship with his now-dead wife.

November Video Update

Those who are patrons get to giggle at my inept attempts at providing short video updates on my writing goals. Here’s this month’s awkward stuttering.

What I Most Dread About Submitting to Agents

Patrons often get exclusive insights or advance notice of announcements. Here I talk about a particularly irksome aspect of submitting to agents, and also include the pitch for my current submission, gothic mystery novel The White Nest. However, that isn’t the real title. It’s a placeholder temporary title. I will announce the real title here eventually, but if you’re a supporter on Patreon, you already know it, and have been sworn to secrecy (it’s included in this article).

Outside Patreon, I’ve also had the usual busy month on Medium. Here are a few highlights, beginning with a rather silly piece that I hope you find gigglesome.

A Typical Day in the Dillon Empire

The horrible result of foolishly responding to a writing prompt. Let it act as a warning to others, lest they likewise fall to darkness.

Les Diaboliques: Best Twist Ever?

Henri-Georges Clouzot’s 1955 fiendish horror-thriller remains an all-time favourite.

The Rings of Power Series One: The Dillon Empire Verdict

Passive protagonists, pointless preambles, and the lack of a clear-cut premise results in a boredom-inducing mess.

My Ten Favourite Horror Films

An agonisingly selected smorgasbord of scariness.

My Ten Favourite Martin Scorsese Films

Also, the Dillon Empire’s fury at recent ignorant criticisms of the great director.

Poltergeist: 40 Years On

Was director Tobe Hooper or producer Steven Spielberg the dominant creative force behind the 1982 paranormal horror classic?

One Genuinely Great Thing about the Star Wars Prequels: John Williams

The legendary maestro gave these disappointing films a set of scores to die for.

That’s it from me this month. Thank you again for all your support, and a special big thank you to all my supporters on Patreon – Claus, Robin, David S, David P, Steve, Emma, Sterling, Galina, Ian, Gillian, Yasmine and Ville, plus those who have contributed one-off donations on Ko-fi. Also, thank you to Ruth and Iain, and thank you to every one of you who has bought books, reviewed books, and promoted or supported me in other ways. You know who you are, and I wouldn’t be here without you.

Thank you again supporting my writing.

What To Do With “Off-Brand” Novels, and Where Do I Get My Ideas?

Posted on November 11, 2022 by simondillon

The Bodleian Library in Oxford also features in my novel *The Balliol Conspiracy*. Photo by Lina Kivaka on Pexels

One question authors dread is: Where do you get your ideas? A reasonable enquiry, but often a fiend to answer. Inspiration is a slippery, elusive thing; difficult to pin down in concrete specifics, and infinitely variable. Recently, I faced this question anew, when asked by someone considering supporting me on Patreon. Specifically, he wanted to know where I got the idea for my as-yet-unpublished mystery novel The Balliol Conspiracy.

He asked because for supporters at a certain level, I have just started to serialise this novel in draft form. It’s an exclusive bonus for their patronage, offering the opportunity to read a novel that, in all honesty, I’m rather unsure what to do with. Why am I unsure? Mostly because, as this potential patron pointed out, it sits rather outside my usual oeuvre. It’s a thriller, but it isn’t a gothic horror-thriller of the kind that forms the bulk of my novel output. It sits a genre apart, beginning as an unusual psychological thriller, before evolving into a romantic spy thriller of sorts, akin to something like Hitchcock’s version of The 39 Steps (which added a romantic element absent from John Buchan’s original novel) or North by Northwest.

So why write The Balliol Conspiracy at all, if it’s not really my thing? For a start, it wouldn’t be the first time I’ve attempted to go “off-brand”, if you’ll forgive my use of an obscenity. Some years ago, I wrote animal fiction adventure novel Echo and the White Howl. Animal fiction is exceptionally hard to write well, as I discovered. A fascinating and challenging learning experience ensued. I had to go through the manuscript with a fine toothcomb, removing phrases like “couldn’t put his finger on what was wrong”, because, of course, wolves don’t have fingers. Nor could they have knowledge beyond what they would naturally know (no concept of the sea, for instance), yet they need emotional attributes to which human readers can relate: Courage, ambition, anger, love, a sense of humour, and so forth. It was an absolute minefield, but at least I could answer the question of inspiration in a clear, straightforward manner: I wrote it because my youngest son wanted a novel about wolves.

In the case of The Balliol Conspiracy, the question proved much harder to answer. I scratched my head, recalling a conversation with my history-buff adopted brother about how Oliver Cromwell seized the silver of Balliol College in Oxford for his New Model Army during the English Civil War (an incident referenced in BBC classic comedy series Yes Minister episode Doing the Honours). This may have been the spark for the story. Then again, around the same time, whilst directing a TV shoot near Tromso in Norway (of all places), a conversation I had with the cameraman also may have been the genesis of this project. Shivering in temperatures of minus twenty degrees Celsius, he told me about eccentric characters bidding in auctions for unclaimed left luggage at airports; a kind of pot-luck exercise that can lead to the discovery of curious items. This also sparked my interest and informed the premise of the novel.

Despite this sort of inspiration, I still can’t quite understand why I persevered with what proved to be an exceptionally difficult writing experience. The main reason I struggled is I was determined, for once, to write a novel that wouldn’t give my mother nightmares. I fought every instinct in my body to make left turns into horror territory, determining that come hell or high water, it would remain at PG levels of suitability (though it is a grown-up book). The Balliol Conspiracy is still a strong, suspenseful, compelling narrative, but damn, it was hard reining in my urge to make it gory and scary.

At its heart, this is a history-based treasure hunt tale, leading to a new lease of life for its bereaved structural engineer protagonist, who has a mysterious compulsion for purchasing and cataloguing suitcases left in airports. I explained this to my potential patron, but he didn’t seem satisfied with the premise, or my vague explanations about inspiration. But because spoilers are against my religion, I didn’t want to reveal anything further, except that the novel also involves Balliol College, the infamous “Galloping Gertie” Tacoma Narrows bridge disaster, and the head of Oliver Cromwell.

Relaying this clutch of eclecticism provoked a frown from my interlocutor. He seemed particularly bemused by how the Tacoma Narrows bridge disaster could intermesh with a story about left luggage and Oliver Cromwell’s head. Again, I didn’t want to get into spoilers, but I reiterated that the protagonist is a bridge structural engineer, and that there are some esoteric reasons why the incident has a place in the novel.

I’m not sure he was convinced, and again, I was left wondering what, if anything, will ultimately become of The Balliol Conspiracy. My wife insists it is a good novel, but it is definitely a one-off, and I don’t think I’ll be showing it to agents or publishers any time soon, as I’m trying to sell myself as a purveyor of gothic horror-thrillers. I may get it properly polished up and self-published at some point, and then my mother will finally have the opportunity to read it (without fear of nightmares). In the meantime, I hope the draft version proves a fun benefit for my Patreon supporters, but with any luck, they resist asking where I get my ideas.

(This article was originally published on Medium.)

To support me on Patreon, at £2, £4, £8, or £25 per month, check out my Patreon page here.

Borrowing History in My Novels

Posted on August 13, 2021 by simondillon

Many of my novels draw on history for their narratives, particularly the local history of where I live, in southwest England. Here are three examples of more fascinating historic footnotes that I appropriated, and massaged a little, for inclusion in my stories. The first two are from novels presently available, and the last one is from a manuscript I am holding on to for the time being.

The Dissolving of Buckfast Abbey (referenced in Uncle Flynn)

The facts: Henry VIII went about dissolving many Catholic monasteries during his reign. One of these was Buckfast Abbey, in the village of Buckfastleigh, on the southern borders of Dartmoor, which is a short distance east of where I live. The Abbey was dissolved by Sir William Petre, who in 1539, under instructions from the King, seized considerable amounts of gold which were subsequently taken to the Tower of London. William Petre later retired to the south-west. The Abbey was restored in the 1800s.

My fiction: In Uncle Flynn, the protagonist, eleven-year-old Max, and his mysterious adventurer uncle (who apparently has the police on his tail), uncover clues to hidden treasure written by a monk at the time of the dissolution. He supposedly took a vast amount of the Abbey’s gold, along with priceless Catholic library manuscripts, and buried them in a secret location on Dartmoor. This local legend is supported by William Petre’s supposed obsession with trying to locate this treasure that slipped through his fingers during the dissolution. It also explains why he chose to retire in the southwest.

Slaves of Lundy Island (referenced in The Thistlewood Curse)

The facts: Lundy Island is a tiny island on the Bristol coast, about three miles long and half a mile wide. It is sparsely populated, with limited local amenities, including a church, the Marisco Tavern, and a small airstrip where helicopters can land. Lundy Castle has since been divided into holiday homes. Electricity is only available at certain times of day, and there is no mobile phone signal (though there is a radio in the tavern).

Lundy has a rich and fascinating history, but one episode informed The Thistlewood Curse more than any other. Thomas Benson was an MP for Barnstaple when he owned Lundy in the 18th century. He also traded from the North Devon port of Bideford after inheriting a family fortune. His vessels transported tobacco, but he also kept a slave workforce on Lundy procured from convicts he was supposed to transport to America. After getting involved in smuggling, Benson’s misdeeds were discovered but managed to escape justice by fleeing abroad.

My fiction: Thomas Benson becomes Henry Thistlewood in my novel. As per real life, he secretly holds convicts intended for transportation to Virginia and uses them as slaves on the island. However, I devised the background for a ghost story: One slave, Jeremiah Adams, is executed with medieval barbarity after allegedly raping Thistlewood’s wife Cora. Whilst enduring death agonies, Adams curses the Thistlewood family line, swearing he will return to wipe them out.

In the present day, Henry Thistlewood’s descendant, Charles Thistlewood, son of Lord Alfred Thistlewood, mysteriously drops dead, having suffered an inexplicable heart attack. His wife Sally is an old friend of protagonist Detective Laura Buchan. Despite the doctor claiming Charles’s death is an open and shut case of tragic heart attack, Sally suspects foul play and asks Laura to come and secretly investigate, during Charles’s funeral. Laura brings along another childhood friend of theirs, paranormal investigator Lawrence Crane, who uses astral projection to try and discover the truth.

I won’t say anything more about the plot as I wouldn’t want to spoil it, but I will add that in my novel Lundy Castle is still occupied by the Thistlewoods, not divided into holiday homes.

Oliver Cromwell’s Head (referenced in The Balliol Conspiracy)

The facts: During the English Civil War, Balliol College in Oxford had its silver taken by the Roundheads and melted down for Oliver Cromwell’s New Model Army. After Cromwell’s death, when the monarchy returned, Charles II had Cromwell’s body dug up, put on trial, hanged, drawn, and quartered. His head was placed on a spike in London as a warning against anyone who’d seek to overthrow the monarchy again. Here’s where the facts get bizarre: Oliver Cromwell’s head was stolen, preserved, and changed hands multiple times (at one point it was hidden stuffed up a chimney), before supposedly being buried in Sidney Sussex College, Cambridge. Exactly where is unknown.

My fiction: My as-yet-unpublished novel The Balliol Conspiracy involves the above facts, though I tweak them by pretending Cromwell’s head was buried in Oxford. I won’t say any more about the plot, as the novel is strictly under wraps, suffice to say it’s a treasure hunt adventure for grown-ups, with a spy thriller element and a romantic element. I’ve not penned anything else quite like this, and it took quite some effort to rein in my gothic horror sensibilities whilst writing, to keep the narrative to PG levels. But I was determined that, for once, I’d write a novel that my mother could enjoy.

Uncle Flynn is available from Amazon here (in the UK) and here (in the US).

The Thistlewood Curse is available from Amazon here (in the UK), here (in the US), and here (from Smashwords).

The Balliol Conspiracy will be released at some point in the future. Watch this space.

Coming Soon, Later, and Perhaps Never: October 2020 Update

Posted on October 1, 2020 by simondillon

A couple of years ago, I posted an article with the same title, expounding on exactly where I was at with my novels, in their varying states of disrepair. Here’s a full update, sort-of divided by genre. Bear in mind one of these will be released very soon, almost certainly before the end of the year.

Fantasy

Ravenseed – This Dark Ages set fantasy novel is now on its third draft, having received largely positive feedback from various sources. It’s a brooding, melancholy tale of knights, sorcerers, and enchantment, simmering with love, lust, betrayal, and revenge. Alongside the Dark Ages story is a parallel framing story set in the present.

The Faerie Gate – My long-delayed, horror-story-for-children is now on its fourth draft. Originally written in 2015, it’s definitely the scariest novel I’ve written that is primarily aimed at children, and it really pushes the envelope in that respect. But this dark fairy tale is also a very compassionate story, about a young adolescent coming to terms with the separation of her parents. I’m also planning an epic sequel which may end up being more than one sequel, set in the same universe. The sequel(s) might be aimed at a more “young adult” readership. I’ll know more once I start writing this next year.

The Deviant Prophet – Another dark fairy tale, but this time for adults. Fantasy and reality clash in a disturbing tale of religious oppression, amid a vivid and surreal world parallel to our own. The initial inspiration for this came from a close friend’s extraordinary dreams. I finished a third draft earlier this year.

Goldeweed – This is an epic, three volume fantasy saga I have been shaping on and off for almost eighteen years. Set in a vast imagined realm on many different planes of reality, it details three love stories that play out against an apocalyptic backdrop at the end of an era. Currently longer than War and Peace, it’s a tale I have rewritten and tinkered with for some time, and I’m still not entirely happy with it.

Gothic Mystery Thriller/Horror

The White Nest – This novel is something of a culmination for me; a summing up of all the tropes, themes, and ideas I have explored in earlier gothic mystery novels. But although there is an element of Now-That’s-What-I-Call-a-Simon-Dillon-Gothic-Mystery about this novel, it is also radically different in two ways. Firstly, it features a male protagonist. Secondly, it is the most intensely personal novel I’ve written since Children of the Folded Valley. Yes, I know all writing is “personal”, but this one really jabbed raw nerves in an ultimately cathartic way, tapping into traumatic fears regarding siblings, parental fears, false guilt, and more. It is also something of a coming of age novel, despite the genre trappings. One more point: The White Nest refers to something sinister in the story, but it’s only a placeholder title. I’m keeping the real title secret for now.

Wormcutter – From something I wrote in 2020, to something I wrote in 2007 (from an idea I had researched on and off since 1996), this detective thriller/horror hybrid begins as an apparently open and shut murder investigation, then escalates into a humdinger of a conspiracy, involving the Freemasons and much more… until it ends up in the most disturbing territory I have ever explored in a novel (definitely 18 certificate stuff). Currently on its fourth draft, and due for another polish.

Miscellaneous

The Balliol Conspiracy – This somewhat old-fashioned, Hitchcockian romantic spy thriller is a conspiracy story of a different kind (much more PG territory, unlike Wormcutter), and proved a real change of pace for me when I wrote it. A strong, suspenseful central mystery results in an historic, fact-based treasure hunt, leading to a new lease of life for the bereaved protagonist. I don’t want to say too much more, except that yes, it does involve Balliol College in Oxford (see above picture). I also wanted to write a grown-up book that, for once, my mother would be able to read without having nightmares. Currently on its second draft, its actually grown on me quite a bit since I first wrote it, and my wife thinks I should attempt more stories of this kind. But I suspect it is a one-off. We’ll see.

Peaceful Quiet Lives – This dystopian tale imagines a bleak American future, satirising the worst fears of both sides in the so-called culture wars. At the same time, it is also a love story, featuring protagonists who fall foul of political extremists of all persuasions. This novel is currently on its fourth draft, and represents a real oddity for me, as it is quite unlike anything I’ve ever written. Like Children of the Folded Valley and The White Nest, it is also a highly “personal” novel.

A Statement of Disbelief – Another satirical novel, this time set in the dubious world of Christian television fundraising. It’s only had one draft, but quite honestly, I’m not sure it will ever see the light of day. However, I will confess it was great fun to write.

Short Stories – It’s also worth mentioning that I’ve written quite a collection of short stories, mostly horror and science fiction (including one of novella length). I may publish a volume of these at some point.

To reiterate, one of the above will almost certainly be released before the end of the year. Can you guess which one? Watch this space for an imminent announcement.

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